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Rejection is what happens when someone does not follow up, blows you off or straight up does not respond or react to you. And guess what? It happens to EVERYONE.
No one has ever escaped being rejected from someone, somewhere at some point. Even the Victoria’s Secret Angels and our beloved heroes and those we look up to.
Professionals make things look so easy and I want to give you some tips on how to deal with rejection like someone who knows what they’re doing and isn’t crushed or super upset about it.
First of all, let’s just take this second in time to remind ourselves of how amazing we are. Like on a real level. You are amazing.
You may know it, you might have forgotten, but at the end of each and every day, you are incredible and you deserve the best.
Now that we have the facts out of the way, let’s talk scenarios.
There will be people who don’t respond to you after a date, networking event, interview, or random meeting somewhere.
There will also be people who respond and then ghost on you- never to be heard or seen from again.
This is normal.
Like 100%, totally normal and happens all around the world each and every day.
You are not the only victim of a California Flake (someone who makes initiates and makes plans with you and then disappears and acts like they have no idea what you’re talking about later).
You are are also not the only victim of a great first date or connection with someone only to never get a text or call back again.
Here’s how to deal with these things though: accept it, move on and the kicker: DO NOT TAKE IT PERSONALLY.
You could take it personally- that’s what most people do (hell, I used to do it and it used to HURT)… but it doesn’t make you feel any better, does it?
At least it didn’t for me.
So here’s the first thing: accepting it.
I think it’s always a good idea to call a spade a spade.
You didn’t get the text back – or a text at ALL… okay.
The person who interviewed you never e-mailed or called like they said they would… okay.
Just accept it.
Why? Because it’s okay. Sometimes things happen. Sometimes shit just isn’t meant to be.
Pro tip: It’s okay to be sad about it. Cry, journal it out, bitch to your friends over cocktails, call your Mom, hit your Dammit Doll, etc. Let it out in a good, cleansing, healthy way. It’ll help you feel better faster, I promise.
Pro tip 2: There will be more opportunities. I 100% guarantee it.
Second- Move on.
This is an important tip because wallowing in self-pity is not hot and no one wants to be around someone who’s throwing their own pity party and looks pitiful, miserable and sad.
Move on because you have better shit to do and you should be focused on what’s next, what’s around the corner and what’s headed your way that is clearly better than what you just almost experienced.
Move on because if you’re still focused on the shit that isn’t working out you may miss out on something better that’s rapidly approaching you. Missed opportunities happen when people aren’t paying attention because they’re living in a land of “What If’s”.
Don’t worry- I used to frequent this town (I might have even been the mayor a few times too). What If’s is not a good place to be. It never gets you where you want to go and no one should ever stay for more than one night or things just start to spiral out of control.
Lastly, please don’t take it personally.
9 times out of 10 it isn’t personal, it’s the other person. It’s a situation that you don’t even know is going on and it has nothing to do with you.
Sometimes guys don’t text or call back even after a good time.
Sometimes potential clients disappear into the abyss for whatever reason.
Sometimes someone promises you something and doesn’t follow through and totally leaves you hanging.
Just remember: don’t take it personally.
Whenever I assume something and whenever I assume something is about ME, I am usually wrong and end up looking selfish and extra.
And we all know that’s rarely a good look.
I’m sure you’ve all had experiences where something happened and you thought it was the end and that the opportunity was missed and you didn’t lose face and then BOOM you get the call or important e-mail. And shit changes for the better.
Sometimes the Universe is testing your attitude and your fortitude. How bad do you want something and how willing are you to live without it the way you think it should be?
Huge Pro Tip: Don’t discredit the way things are going in your life and always believe that things are working out in your favor.
Ask a professional the next time you meet one- someone who is killing it in their industry or is just an all around bad ass at life and ask they how they dealt with being rejected. See what they say.
I guarantee you it’ll be something around leaving their ego at the door and figuring out a way from being up under their feelings or expectations about something.
Think I’m wrong? I challenge you to ask someone.
Ask your Mom or someone you admire or love. Get their 2 cents on the topic. And then take what you hear and remember it the next time things don’t go your way, as planned or the way you really felt like they should have.
Rejection is inevitable but we don’t have to be a sucker to it.
We do not have to take the blow of rejection and let us keep us down for a ridiculous amount of time.
You are the captain now.
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