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Showing up for yourself can be difficult..
Being consistent at anything becomes hard at some point, even when you love the thing you’re doing…
So how do you make sure that no matter what, you’re showing up for yourself, regularly?
I mean, you ARE your #1 priority, right?
As many of you know I typically speak to single, children-free women who are busy working and handling business, taking names and crushing goals.
What I see happening more often than not among this group of women is this urge to people-please, have loose boundaries and prioritize people and things before ourselves or our own well-being.
This is problematic.
It’s problematic for women all over the world from every walk of life in any stage of life or tax bracket- but this is my lane, so bare with me.
People-pleasing, having flimsy or no boundaries, not using your words, and prioritizing other people (to include securing the bag) are some of the top ways to not show up for yourself on a regular basis.
I mean how can you show up for yourself when you’re showing up for everyone around you all the time?
How can you do things for yourself when you’re too busy doing for those around you?
How can you properly take care of yourself when you’re trying to secure the bag so hard you forget to eat right and sleep properly?
These are the questions many of us don’t want to deal with but that we must if we want to see positive change in our lives, health and overall wellness.
The good news: change comes in many forms and you can get super creative with it.
To me, showing up for myself means regularly checking in with how I’m feeling, how I’m doing and knowing where I need support.
Sometimes it means laying down when I really need to rest (if only for 20 mins).
Somtimes it means turning down some turn-up plans when I need to stay in the house and breathe and maybe read a book.
Sometimes it means asking someone to help me with something I’ve been struggling with for a minute that I know they’re good at.
There are so many reasons I think we drop the ball on showing up for ourselves and I think one of them is time. We’re so busy we often don’t even think to check in with ourselves and do a wellness or sanity check.
And then we burn out or sleep for 14hrs in a row and have no idea why…
If you’re busy and this is definitely where you tend to drop the ball- start scheduling things in.
Whether you use a paper calendar or your phone or an app, start scheduling things in.
If you have an Apple Watch you can challenge yourself to use the Breathe App function every day for 5 minutes.
If you have back to back meetings, start scheduling lunch or coffee time or time where you can call someone who always makes you laugh or vent to.
Maybe for you this means creating a morning routine where you do things only for yourself in the morning as part of an everyday activity.
This could be journaling for 5 minutes or listening to an inspirational podcast while you do your makeup or repeating positive affirmations in the shower or working out or meditating before you start your day forreal.
Again- there is no one size fits all here. You have to figure out what works for you and that it’s something you will do regularly.
Not showing up for yourself will lead to the following:
- Burn out
- Extreme fatigue / exhaustion
- Fluctuating moods / irritability / frustration
- Being taken advantage of by those around you
- Never having time to do things you want to do
- Little to no social life
- Stagnancy in certain areas of your life
- Feelings of disconnection with yourself, your dreams, your goals
None of this is sexy.
None of this is “boss bitch” status.
None of this feels good.
Only you have full control to prevent these things from happening.
You have to prioritize yourself as often as possible and like your life depends on it because in actuality it does and thinking it doesn’t is a young girls’ game.
Depending on your personality, there may be some really good options and ways for your to tune in with yourself more often and really start showing up for yourself in meaningful ways.
If you’d like some tips and tricks and my personal opinion on what might work for you and actually help out- schedule a call with me here. I can only do so much in a blog post 🙁
For everyone who knows what to do and how they can show up for themselves, perfect- let’s work on consistency.
If you know what to do and how you can best show up for YOU, but tend to do it for a few days or a couple of times a month and then forget and think about it 20 seconds away from burning out or passing out from exhaustion, hit me up.
I can keep you accountable to yourself, no problem. And tbh, it’s harder for most people in our regular social circles to hold you accountable to interpersonal goals and that’s why it’s so important for us to find the right coach/consultant to work with.
Wherever you are in your personal development journey, I honor you.
This is not easy work but you’re doing it. You’re trying.
And even if you don’t show up as often as you’d like or give yoursel the breaks that you really need- you care enough to work on your overall self-care and deeply want to do better for yourself.
Show up for yourself as often as you can and do your best.
That’s all anyone can ever ask of you.
God speed + lots of love,